"The Bottom 50" Funeral Eulogies -- Have to read 'em to believe 'em!

From the Absolute Bottom 50 Blog: Oh, and my comment is.... "With freinds like these - who needs enemies?" Read them and laugh : )

1. She died as she lived: oddly dressed and smelling vaguely of turpentine.
   
   
2. Death is not an end, but a beginning. Specifically, the beginning of an eternity of black nothingness.
   
   
3. He had many hobbies, and he was very proud of them. He had that rarest of gifts: the ability to find the beauty and artistry in the hardcore amateur farm porn he shot with his Super 8 over at Oakville Community Stables.
   
   
4. He touched all of our lives. Unfortunately, he also touched several of our children.
   
   
5. Bill was not a rich man. He was not a proud man. He was not a successful man. Nor was he especially attractive, articulate, or even remotely respected. Neither was he particularly well-liked or hygienic. So I suppose, what I'm really trying to say is... there's cake back at the house and if we hurry, we can probably catch the second half of the Bulls game.
   
   
6. The French have a term, "le petit mort." It is ironic that in his obsessive pursuit of this so-called "little death," that Dan's own flawed autoerotic asphyxiation techniques should lead him to such a big, honkin' drawer-soiling demise.
   
   
7. There's no getting around it: Bob was a big, fat, sweaty pig of a man, which means that now, there's more pie for the rest of us. Dig in!
   
   
8. And through our tears of grief, let us endeavor to never forget the flatulent hilarity that ensued each time Uncle Mikey graced us with his presence. Surely the Seraphim themselves are pulling upon his finger at this very moment.
   
   
9. I loved my son! I loved my gay son! I loved my gay, tax-evading, alcoholic, armed-robbing ex-convict son whose real father was a crackhead street hustler who went by the name "Little Miss Meat Saddle!"
   
   
10. And while it is truly a tragedy when someone so young is taken from us so unexpectedly, it is doubly heart-wrenching in circumstances such as these, when a promising career in direct-to-video adult entertainment is cut so terribly short.
    
    
11. His spirit will be with us always. And by spirit, I mean overwhelming credit card debt.
    
    
12. She was a woman well ahead of her time, whose near-legendary promiscuity set the gold standard for generations of post-Women's-Lib tramps.
    
    
13. Hers was a pure, goodly, and chaste life, which helped to ensure that her heart, liver, and kidneys were especially desirable on the organ transplant black market.
    
    
14. Tom consumed life with zeal. Positively gorged himself on it. In fact, if life was the frozen carcass of an extinct mastodon, partially emerged from a shrinking glacier, Tom was the ravenous jaws of a starving coyote, blindly feasting upon its gamey, semi-decayed goodness.
    
    
15. Behold our beloved grandmother... her crooked, nagging maw silent and still at last.
    
    
16. And let us pray for Earl's sake that they have reruns of "Mama's Family" in heaven. Or God help God.
    
    
17. Dearly beloved, we are gathered here to honor #456-B's life before consigning him to lot #5, space #A-16. Praise God.
    
    
18. Ladies and Gentlemen: Put your hands together for everybody's favorite stiff: Marty! I know you're wondering how Marty got to the funeral home from the hospital - he drove his CARcass! Har! Har! Try the veal!
    
    
19. I still can't get over that he's gone. I also can't get over that I totally survived that same car accident! Can you believe it? I should have had my head cracked off like what's-his-name here.
    
    
20. Let us give thanks that the Lord, in his infinite wisdom, took our dear sister to heaven in her prime, thereby proving his benevolence and love for us all.
    
    
21. He used to look up at me and it was so difficult to talk, because he had four or five chins, and he'd wheeze, "Just fifty… more… pounds." And then he'd eat seven or eight Twinkies and a couple of cheeseburgers. I've never known such steely discipline. He died reaching for a dream.
    
    
22. I don't think I'll ever get over him. But if anyone wants to try and help me, I'm in the back by the boxes of wine.
    
    
23. I hope she's in a happier place. But let's be honest: you don't get struck by lightening during a sunny day because God loves you, you know? Still, we can HOPE.
    
    
24. Frankie Two Thumbs wasn't a bad guy. You know what I'm talkin' about? He could make a mean baked ziti. And he smelled good, always with the fancy cologne. So it is with deepest respects that we fill his stomach with concrete and toss him in the East River.
    
    
25. Steve wasn't unhappy about life. He was just super excited to die!
    
    
26. What can I say about the recently deceased? I didn't know her personally, but members of her extended family have contributed generously to my parish. God bless!
    
    
27. As the proprietor of this funeral home, I can honestly say that never before has such a magnificent sample of corpus delicti crossed over my embalming table.
    
    
28. A last wish is a last wish. So, according to his will, we will now shoot Ted out of this cannon into the ocean while the local high school madrigals sing "Yesterday." Man, even dead he's high maintenance.
    
    
29. She seduced my husband, spread vicious rumors about me, and got me fired from my dream job. That's all I want to say really, I just want to be in the front of the line when we start burying the bitch.
    
    
30. Without further adieu... who wants to douse the coffin in gasoline and who wants to hammer this broken broomstick through the asshole's heart?
    
    
31. I loved him more than any other man. Sure, sometimes I peeked at others, but that's completely natural. And okay, sometimes I squeezed, grabbed, and stroked too - but that doesn't mean I didn't love him with all of my heart.
    
    
32. Ashes to ashes, dust to dust - wait a second - that's a nice ring. Anyone mind if I try it on? Not like he's gonna notice! Anyone?
    
    
33. Okay, whoever painted Dad up like a circus clown better confess now, or I swear to Jesus Christ when I find out who it is, I'll bury them WITH him.
    
    
34. I remember old Harry. We had some good times. Like the time we were driving drunk on that dark road and ran down that old lady and kept on driving. The memories come back, don't they?
    
    
35. And finally, let us meditate on his last words - "Warm up my goddamned bedpan you ungrateful, good-for-nothing retard before I -ACK!"
    
    
36. The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want. Except maybe less debt, because once those vultures are done picking through the will, I'm gonna be left with enough money for a whiskey sour, a hot fudge sundae, and a roll with an octogenarian streetwalker!
    
    
37. For whom the bell tolls? It tolls for thee. But later. The bell really tolled for Carol here. Tolled so much she mysteriously caught fire after the third car ran her over.
    
    
38. I'm sorry… I don't usually get choked up. But anyway, sprinkle a little of Jenny's ash in the bowl and pass the ceremonial bong. We promised her we'd smoke her up, man. And we are!
    
    
39. It's always sad when God calls a child home. But in the case of Larry here, I'm not so sad. Nice guy, smoked too much, whatever. So to Larry - nice knowing you, see you later.
    
    
40. I have already apologized to his family, and to his friends. But let me do it again: I am sorry for stealing my best friend Dave's body and doing that funny "Weekend at Bernie's" thing. But it was our favorite movie - and dragging him around to a bar seemed like the right thing to do. I had no idea he was so... delicate.
    
    
41. As you know, Jeff bought the ranch while doin' his favorite ho, and I like to think he'll have that great big gap-toothed Jeff-grin on his mug for all eternity. Yo' and if you see a skanky-looking blonde with tattoos on her hands driving a black beemer, call the cops - the bitch took his keys!
    
    
42. Here lies my son, Mr. Rich Big Shot. You'd think he could spend 25 cents on a phone call to his mother before killing himself in one of those fancy hotels with the bidet and everything.
    
    
43. My husband's funeral is going to cost me almost ten thousand dollars. So forgive me if I'm pissed off that he's not wearing any pants! I paid for pants! I don't care if the coffin covers his waist. Furthermore: Stanley never wore rouge!
    
    
44. We all knew Chris to be unusual in life… as well as death. Anyway - he really, really, really wanted y'all to eat this paté. He force-fed himself with oats and stuff for weeks before kicking off just to make sure the paté had a smooth, rich flavor.
    
    
45. I never screwed Cynthia. But I wanted to and God knows I tried. Even now, in death, I'd have to say I still wouldn't kick the broad out of my bed.
    
    
46. One more toast to the old bum! God rest his soul! And may we all stay oblivious to the crippling irony of a bunch of emotionally immature alcoholics getting bombed so that they can pretend to deal with the death of a friend who was so drunk he killed himself and a family of six sitting in the window of that Arby's at the intersection.
    
    
47. What happens to us when we die? I have no idea, but holy fuck am I terrified. And I'm a priest, for the love of Christ!
    
    
48. In conclusion: I want each of you - all four hundred of you - to join me in song and take up the little milk bones that were just passed out. Take up the milk bones and toss them in little Poopy's casket. He'll need them in Doggie Heaven!
    
    
49. I know you're shocked to see me here, but listen: a verdict of innocent is a verdict of innocent. High priced lawyers and head in the refrigerator or not, I'm innocent and I'm gonna miss this bitch as much as any of you bozos.
    
    
50. I'll never forget the last time I seen him. He was all, "Betcha $50 I can wrestle a 'gator." And I was all, "You're on!"

Flashback ... Celebrity Death Photos

I came across this site. It is interesting. It is morbid. And I actually really thought about whether I should post this or not. Photos of dead celebrities. Abraham Lincoln, Kennedy, Monroe... and it occurred to me; that maybe, just maybe, for those who think suicide is some grand exit .... if they see these photos and see death for what it is, "the end" of life in the physical body, and that celebrities die the same way everyone else does, maybe they will see that physicially it is not pretty or someting to aspire to do on one's own. I'd like to know what you think .... leave this post up or pull it. Visit Flashback.

In Celebration of Elvis' Life ... Knit your own Elvis Wig!

Too priceless not to post!

Only the Brit's would thing to do this. Create a pattern for a Knitted Elvis Wig - Directions available at The Shed's site! (below)

The hand knitted Elvis wig pattern is FREE and the brainchild of artist Simon Thackray, the knitted Elvis wig was specially designed by Sirdar to coincide with the world's first North Yorkshire Elvis Bus Tour.

Photo: (left to right) Ian McMillan, Wendy Moorby, David Rawson and Simon Thackray To get the pattern; visit The Shed.

Now, if you don't knit... you can go to the Elvis store and buy one!

Death and the Journalist ... Interesting Article

There are two kinds of journalists in this world: Those who think that writing obituaries is the news equivalent of scooping up behind the circus elephants, and those who understand that it can be a uniquely gratifying form of writing. (Guess which I am.) The obituaries editor at The Economist has been keeping a wonderful online diary with reflections on the job, the topic, and how it intersects with the life of a writer charged with documenting lives at their close. (Source USA Today)

The Death List ~ Definitely a List You Don't Want to Be On

Hmmmmmm, came across a site called "The Death List".... interesting... and yes, creepy. Basicaly, they pick 50 people who they predict will die in the year. So far they have been right on 6/ out of 50 as of today. Tammy Faye was the last who was predicted right. What was a little unnerving for me was the message board ... mainly because the discussion I read was on Ernest Borgnine... who I adore. They are wondering if this is his year because he is 88, overweight, etc., etc..... I hope poor Ernie doesn't see it : ) Here's the blurb if you are interested in reading about their site:

"2007 sees the twentieth anniversary of the DeathList so let’s hope for a particularly successful year. For those unfamiliar with DeathList, here is a quick recap of the idea: A list of 50 celebrities is selected by the DeathList committee before the start of each calendar year for their likelihood to die during that year. Candidates must have a certain level of famousness, which is basically that their demise must be expected to be reported by the UK media. Candidates are ineligible if their only claim to fame is their likely death in the near future. Also, no more than 25 celebrities that appeared on the previous year’s list can be selected. 2006 finished with a solid score of 13 successes, but the 2003 record of 14 deaths remains intact. "

The Page of the Dead... Intersting stuff here!

There are thoughts that won't be spoken / And there's so much we can't discussBut there are moments that will live forever / And some of them are owned by us

From a Really Nice Website: The And Room Archives

Lots of information: Biographies SectionA huge selection of (bio)graphical information on people with some claim to fame, mostly focussing on the nineteenth century. Here is the index.The Page of The DeadJoséphine de Beauharnais, Oscar Wilde, Robert and Clara Schumann, Heinrich Heine, all the others... They left us in this world alone. But we can pay them a last respect, by visiting them at The Page of The Dead.

If you are into tombstones and gravesites... lot's of lovely pictures of resting places -- and info on famous playwrights, writers and even pirates -- like Captain Bligh.....

Oscar ~ Cat That Acurately Predicts Death ....

PROVIDENCE, R.I. - Oscar the cat seems to have an uncanny knack for predicting when nursing home patients are going to die, by curling up next to them during their final hours. His accuracy, observed in 25 cases, has led the staff to call family members once he has chosen someone. It usually means they have less than four hours to live.

"He doesn't make too many mistakes. He seems to understand when patients are about to die," said Dr. David Dosa in an interview. He describes the phenomenon in a poignant essay in Thursday's issue of the New England Journal of Medicine.
"Many family members take some solace from it. They appreciate the companionship that the cat provides for their dying loved one," said Dosa, a geriatrician and assistant professor of medicine at Brown University.

The 2-year-old feline was adopted as a kitten and grew up in a third-floor dementia unit at the Steere House Nursing and Rehabilitation Center. The facility treats people with Alzheimer's, Parkinson's disease and other illnesses.

After about six months, the staff noticed Oscar would make his own rounds, just like the doctors and nurses. He'd sniff and observe patients, then sit beside people who would wind up dying in a few hours. Dosa said Oscar seems to take his work seriously and is generally aloof. "This is not a cat that's friendly to people," he said. Oscar is better at predicting death than the people who work there, said Dr. Joan Teno of Brown University, who treats patients at the nursing home and is an expert on care for the terminally ill .

She was convinced of Oscar's talent when he made his 13th correct call. While observing one patient, Teno said she noticed the woman wasn't eating, was breathing with difficulty and that her legs had a bluish tinge, signs that often mean death is near. Oscar wouldn't stay inside the room though, so Teno thought his streak was broken. Instead, it turned out the doctor's prediction was roughly 10 hours too early. Sure enough, during the patient's final two hours, nurses told Teno that Oscar joined the woman at her bedside.

Doctors say most of the people who get a visit from the sweet-faced, gray-and-white cat are so ill they probably don't know he's there, so patients aren't aware he's a harbinger of death. Most families are grateful for the advanced warning, although one wanted Oscar out of the room while a family member died. When Oscar is put outside, he paces and meows his displeasure.

No one's certain if Oscar's behavior is scientifically significant or points to a cause. Teno wonders if the cat notices telltale scents or reads something into the behavior of the nurses who raised him. Nicholas Dodman, who directs an animal behavioral clinic at the Tufts University Cummings School of Veterinary Medicine and has read Dosa's article, said the only way to know is to carefully document how Oscar divides his time between the living and dying.

If Oscar really is a furry grim reaper, it's also possible his behavior could be driven by self-centered pleasures like a heated blanket placed on a dying person, Dodman said. Nursing home staffers aren't concerned with explaining Oscar, so long as he gives families a better chance at saying goodbye to the dying. Oscar recently received a wall plaque publicly commending his "compassionate hospice care."

Adrienne Shelly ... Her Life, Death and the Movie Waitress

What a sad story. I came across this remarkable article about the life, death, and career of Adrienne Shelly by The Observer's Gaby Wood . Once I started reading the piece, I was completely mesmerized, both by the dramatic and tragic circumstances surrounding Shelly's death and by how committed she was to her final film project -- and why.Here's a brief snippet from Wood's article:

"Shelly wrote Waitress when she was pregnant with her daughter, Sophie, who was a toddler by the time it was shot....[Producer Michael] Roiff recalls that when they were editing the film in its final stages, 'one of the things she was most excited about was the fact that she had done this as a woman and as a mother. She was an amazing mum, and I remember one day when we had watched a cut of the film, she turned around and said: "Look, you can do it. Society wants to tell you that you have to choose, but you don't have to choose." To a huge extent, that's what the film's about."Related:In this video, Adrienne Shelly discusses how her feelings about motherhood motivated her to write the script for Waitress. (source Mother of all Blogs)

Florida Passes Legislation Allowing Humans to Be Buried With Their Pets

Florida passed a piece of legislation that allows humans to be buried with their pets. Previously, funeral homes were prohibited from handling animal remains and ashes of humans and animals could not be co-mingled.

At the Best Friends Animal Hospital at Gateway, office manager, Rainy Hoy, said about half of their clients take home their pet’s ashes. “They just want to keep them. They’re like family to them,” Hoy said.

Fort Myers resident Joe Castrogiovanni wouldn’t consider euthanizing his 2-year-old dog Barkley to put him in the casket, but he would consider saving Barkley’s ashes.

“It may be a little weird, but he’s like the son I never had,” Castrogiovanni said.

Jay O’Shaughnessy, funeral director for Anderson Funeral Home of Fort Myers with more than 30 years’ experience, said he has received requests from clients wanting their loved ones to be buried with remains of their pet.

“It’s not a real new deal. We’ve done stranger things than that,” he said. “It’s always the family’s idea.” Complete article here.

He’s right, it’s not unusual. Urngarden has received several requests for urns large enough to contain the pet owner and the ashes of their cats or dogs. Or couples that have left instructions for their children to bury their ashes in the back yard with the family pets. (source)

Frank L. White; The Cream of Wheat Man Gets Headstone!

A box of Cream of Wheat is shown in Detroit, Thursday, June 14, 2007. The man widely believed to be the model for the Cream of Wheat man, a smiling white-hatted chef whose face has greeted breakfasting Americans for more than a century, finally has a grave marker bearing his name and image. Frank L. White died in 1938 may have been an American icon. His grave in Leslie, Mich., bore only a tiny concrete marker with no name. That ended Wednesday, June 13 when a rose granite stone and etching of what is believed to be his likeness were placed at his burial site.

LESLIE, Mich. - A man widely believed to be the model for the smiling chef on Cream of Wheat boxes finally has a grave marker bearing his name.Frank L. White died in 1938, and until this week, his grave in Woodlawn Cemetery bore only a tiny concrete marker with no name.
On Wednesday, a granite gravestone was placed at his burial site. It bears his name and an etching taken from the man depicted on the Cream of Wheat box.

Jesse Lasorda, a family researcher from Lansing, started the campaign to put the marker and etching on White's grave. "Everybody deserves a headstone," Lasorda told the Lansing State Journal. He discovered that White was born about 1867 in Barbados, came to the U.S. in 1875 and became a citizen in 1890.

When White died Feb. 15, 1938, the Leslie Local-Republican described him as a "famous chef" who "posed for an advertisement of a well-known breakfast food."White lived in Leslie for about the last 20 years of his life, and the story of his posing for the Cream of Wheat picture was known in the city of 2,000 located between Jackson and Lansing and about 70 miles west of Detroit.

The chef was photographed about 1900 while working in a Chicago restaurant. His name was not recorded. White was a chef, traveled a lot, was about the right age and told neighbors that he was the Cream of Wheat model, the Jackson Citizen Patriot said.Long owned by Kraft Foods Inc., the Cream of Wheat brand was sold this year to B&G Foods Inc.

For the past 69 years he has been largely forgotten. His grave in Woodlawn Cemetery bore only a tiny concrete marker with no name. That ended Wednesday, when a rose granite stone and etching of what is believed to be his likeness were placed at his burial site.White is thought by many to be the famed face that graced Cream of Wheat advertisements in the early part of the last century. A notation discovered almost three years ago in a yellowed book at the cemetery office marked White's plot No. 310 as that of the "Cream of Wheat man." Thus began a community campaign to give White, who lived in Leslie for about the last 20 years of his life, the recognition that a national celebrity might deserve.

"I heard the Frank White story when I was a little girl," said 70-year-old Sharon Lantz. "I was proud he was from Leslie." As a city resident she helped raise the more than $600 needed to buy the headstone and have it carved with White's name and the date of his death, Feb. 15, 1938. Leslie's Chamber of Commerce kicked in $100 and the rest came a few bucks at a time from folks throughout Greater Lansing. "Some people would drop in the bank and give $1," she said. "They'd see me on the street and give a $1."

There is some doubt whether the Cream of Wheat image is truly that of White, whether anyone even modeled for it and how much that person was paid. Locals, though, are convinced White's story is true and want to preserve it, even though by today's standards of political correctness, some might see the image of a servant chef as demeaning. Jesse Lasorda, who initiated the campaign to put the marker and etching on White's grave, believes White would be pleased.

http://www.lsj.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20070613/VIDEO/706130377/1001 (video)

Things That Make You Go HMMMMMMM.....

WHERE can you find a torture chair, Napoleon’s toothbrush and Florence Nightingale’s slippers? Answer: In a free exhibition that opened in London June 22, 2007.

They are among more than a MILLION bizarre objects stockpiled by eccentric tycoon Sir Henry Wellcome, an obsessive collector. And bewarned, some exhibits, a sample of which are pictured here, could have come straight from a chamber of horrors. Sir Henry, born in America in 1853, made his wedge when he co-founded pharmaceutical company Burroughs Wellcome & Co in London. When he died in 1936 it emerged he had bequeathed his fortune to set up a charity, the Wellcome Trust, to advance medical research. (sources: MAKE: Medicine Man; The Sun Online - News: Things that make you go urrgh! - Link & wellcomecollection.org.

Rockabilly Hall of Fame Has New Unusual Elvis Exhibit

The Rockabilly Hall of Fame, a new museum in Jackson, Tennessee has an unusual exhibit in its collection.

The star exhibit is the defibrillator and paddles which were used to try and revive the dying Elvis Presley in 1977.

"The fact is that it's history," said museum owner and curator Henry Harrison, who raised around $300,000 (£214,000) to open the one-room museum, which has no actual hall of fame yet.

Jackson was the home of Rockabilly singer Carl Perkins, best known for Blue Suede Shoes. He died there in 1998.

The Wedding Ring Coffin ... Bury the past and move on ...."

I sure wish I had thought of this....

"When a marriage dies, what should be done with the wedding ring? Until now, millions of wedding rings have been banished to remote corners of sock and underwear drawers. Now you can give these wedding rings the proper final resting place they deserve.

The Wedding Ring Coffin is the perfect way to close the lid on your dead marriage. It's time to...
"Bury the past and move on to a new tomorrow. ""

Read the creator's About Us Page ... it's great!

“Once upon a time, there lived a young woman who was lucky enough to meet a man who she believed was her prince.They fell in love,got married,had a child,and almost lived happily ever after. But after 20 years of kissing her prince,the woman realized he was actually a frog!"

Thus the wedding ring coffin was created!

The Grave Hunter ... More than a passing fancy : )

Visit the site of the "Celebrity Grave Hunter." If you are looking to find the grave of dead celebrities or a final resting place of the infamous and a biography, this is the site for you!

More Than a Passing FancyCall them weird or macabre, but members of the group Hollywood Underground are deadly serious about their hobby: celebrity grave hunting in L.A.'s star-filled cemeteries.

Source: MARTIN MILLER, Times Staff Writer

J. Watson Garman knows people think he is weird. People above ground anyway. "They find out about it and say, 'Whoa! I think I'll stand over here [away from you]," said Garman, a Venice resident.

The 53-year-old freelance photographer is a member of the Hollywood Underground, a group that is accustomed to reactions of wide-eyed disbelief to their hobby of celebrity grave hunting. At least once a month, the group of a couple dozen members meets at a Los Angeles area cemetery to look for new grave sites and to revisit the final resting places of some of Hollywood's greatest legends.

Garman, like many group members, keeps careful records of his graveside travels. He photographs each new celebrity-related grave and writes down any pertinent information that his diligent research can dig up about the deceased.He then meticulously catalogs the bounty in a three-ring notebook. (Most younger members record the information on their Web pages.) Each letter gets its own binder. His "B" notebook is as thick as a dictionary."My wife thinks I'm crazy," he admitted. "But is this so different than going to a wine auction and paying $5,000 for a bottle?"

Besides, Garman maintains, they aren't the real weirdos. "Compared to the Trekkies, we're like the Salvation Army," he said. "But I have to say there is a real nut element to this and they are the ones that give us a bad name."The "nuts" are the ones who crash graveyards at night. (Hollywood Underground doesn't. Graveyards are closed and it's hard to find a head marker in the dark anyway.) The nuts dress in black. (Actually, some Hollywood Underground members dress in black, but it's not a prerequisite for joining or participating.)

The nuts, Garman said, usually don't have jobs or social lives. (Most Hollywood Underground members have both.) And, in perhaps the most important distinction, the nuts sever the heads off small animals. (Hollywood Underground doesn't. Indeed, many report having happy pets.)
"Once we found a headless chicken behind a gravestone," said Steve Goldstein, a Hollywood Underground member finishing up a book called "Southern California's Graves of the Famous, the Infamous and the Just Plain Dead." "I mean, we're not doing satanic rituals here. We're just normal people with an unusual hobby."

Hollywood Underground is certainly not the only group that chases down dead celebrities. By far, the largest tribe of grave hunter-gatherers is made up of tourists. Camera-toting looky-loos from around the globe frequent many of the Los Angeles area's half dozen or so major cemeteries.

"It's one thing to see where Lucy [Lucille Ball] lived," said Steve Okin of Los Angeles, who is not a member of the Hollywood Underground. "It's another to be standing where she is now. These places are filled with tourists."

Several years ago, Okin helped develop "The Original Map to the Stars' Bones" after attending a funeral and noticing the scads of bused-in folks photographing long-gone celebs. The map, available for sale over the Internet at http://www.graveconcerns.com/, provides the "star-studded" locations of about 350 graves.

Tourists, however, are relative fair-weather fans in the world of celebrity grave hunting. For determination, persistence and organization, it's hard to beat Hollywood Underground.
On a recent Sunday afternoon, members endured 100-degree-plus temperatures to tour one of their favorite haunts, Forest Lawn Memorial-Park in Glendale. The cemetery, which Jack Paar once quipped was "Disneyland for shut-ins," reads like an all-star lineup of entertainment greats. Members passed by Walt Disney, Dorothy Dandridge, Sammy Davis Jr. and Errol Flynn, to name just a very few.

"You get closer to them in death than you ever would have in life," said Goldstein, whose findings from his many graveyard shifts can be seen at http://www.beneathlosangeles.com/. "In a graveyard, you're only 6 feet away."

Sometimes, in cemeteries like Forest Lawn in Glendale, it's hard to get even 6 feet away. Many celebrities, including Mary Pickford, Humphrey Bogart and Dick Powell, are buried behind walls with locked iron gates and doors. It takes a special key to enter, which only cemetery staff, family members and close friends may have.

In fact, among the Los Angeles area cemeteries, Forest Lawn in Glendale is probably the least accommodating to the pursuit of celebrity grave hunting. The graveyard's locked gates and strict policies have earned it the nickname the "Ft. Knox of Cemeteries."

For instance, its Great Mausoleum--resting place of W.C. Fields, Clark Gable and Jean Harlow--allows visitors to grieve for their specific loved one, but then they must leave immediately. No wandering or snooping around for celebrities.

Such a policy, which is designed to protect the privacy and the dignity of the departed, leaves little room for Hollywood Underground members to maneuver. Members try to sneak in quietly, but nearly every member has a tale about being chased off by Forest Lawn staff.
"There's one [staff member] I avoid as much as I can," said Anne Parisi, 33, of San Diego. "She doesn't put up with anything. She can tell who you are and what you are there for."
Most members would probably stay away but can't, because the Glendale cemetery inters most of old Hollywood's most famous dead.

"It's hard to believe they would have spent their life working to be famous and then would want to disappear from the public eye just because they are gone," said Garman, voicing a common grave hunter defense.

It's a defense members have had a lifetime to prepare. Many acquired a fascination for and comfort with cemeteries during childhood. As a youngster growing up near Boston, Goldstein remembers visiting the gravestones of Paul Revere, John Hancock and Louisa May Alcott. Then he collected headstone rubbings--a kind of signature produced by putting a piece of paper upon a headstone and lightly penciling over it. "I had cousins who lived across the street from a cemetery and we used to play there," said the sales manager for a payroll company whose offices are across the street from Holy Cross Cemetery. "I guess I never grew out of it."
Group member Lisa Burks has enjoyed soaking up the tranquil atmosphere of cemeteries since visiting the graves of her grandmother and grandfather as a preteen in Michigan."I always found it very peaceful in cemeteries," said Burks, 39, a press manager for NBC Entertainment. "For me, it's like gardening or going to the beach with a book."

The other common thread among members is a love for old Hollywood. There's scarcely a member that can't rattle off the pictures of Jean Harlow or Douglas Fairbanks Jr. "Sometimes, I think some of us don't even belong in this era," said Parisi, who regularly vacations out of state to track down celebrities, most recently Jackie Gleason in Florida. "It's nice to watch an old movie where you can use your imagination. There was no sex, no violence and it usually was a nice, happy story.""I think it's our way of hanging onto the past," she added. If group members did live in an earlier time, they probably would never have met. The group was formed a few years ago over the Internet. Before finding one another via Web sites and chat rooms, they thought they were solitary souls.

"I used to go alone to cemeteries all the time," said Burks. "I used to be embarrassed about it, but then I found out I wasn't the only one."

In addition to new friends, graveyards have also taught members important life lessons, they said. Burks recalled visiting the grave of former NBC President Brandon Tartikoff at Mount Sinai Memorial Park.

Burks, who began her NBC career as a page, never worked closely with Tartikoff but always admired him, particularly for his kind treatment of lowly pages. Tartikoff died in 1997 of complications of Hodgkin's disease.

"I looked at his grave and it was a celebrity grave," said Burks, who brought flowers from the NBC rose garden. "But it really hit me what a tragedy and a loss it was this man was gone.
"I realized in a cemetery everybody is a somebody to somebody. There are faces and stories behind every gravestone," she added. "It was really sad and touching. It really put me more in contact with life, standing in the cemetery that day."

Members Leave Flowers, Tend to Grave Sites Though group members use photography in their hobby, they are more than graveyard paparazzi. It's not uncommon for members to leave flowers by their favorite stars' graves. And before taking photos, members typically clean up the site. "I used to wash them off with water," said Parisi. "But then I found WD-40. It makes the picture come out better." Members realize that other graveside visitors might not appreciate their pastime and therefore try to be as courteous as possible. "If a funeral is in progress," said Garman. "We give them a wide berth. We don't want to disturb anyone." But he admits other celebrity grave hunters aren't so well-behaved. "I've seen some loud disruptive types," he added. "I've seen them climbing on Bette Davis' grave [Forest Lawn Memorial-Park Hollywood Hills]. That's just uncalled-for."

Over time, members develop loyalties to certain cemeteries and graves. Goldstein prizes the Douglas Fairbanks Sr. grave at Hollywood Forever Cemetery. Burks' No. 1 is Jean Harlow's site at Forest Lawn Glendale.

"I guess my favorite would be Al Jolson [at Hillside Memorial Park]," said Parisi. "He's got a big waterfall and that little sculpture. I guess basically you could say he proved you can take it with you."

In contrast to Forest Lawn Glendale, members have grown to appreciate the openness of other L.A.-area cemeteries. For instance, Holy Cross Cemetery--containing the graves of Bing Crosby, Bela Lugosi and Rita Hayworth--and Hillside Memorial--the resting place of Lorne Greene, Jack Benny and Michael Landon--publish lists and locations of the many stars within their friendly confines.

In fact, some cemeteries are so appealing to members that they have made arrangements to take up permanent residence. Goldstein bought a crypt for himself at Hollywood Forever, where he'll join Tyrone Power, John Huston, Rudolph Valentino and Mel Blanc. "It has a lake and it's real nice," said Goldstein. "I liked the idea of being in the wall and not in the ground where worms can eat me--though I guess I won't know the difference."

Near Death Experience Site that is Really, Really Interesting

Interested in Near Death Experiences? Great site I came across here There's actually so much information that I can't put it all down in this blog. But I can tell you ... it is worth reading and you can spend hours sitting on this web page... Trust me. I did.

Jack Kevorkian AKA/ Dr Death To Be Released June 1, 2007

June 1st 2007, Euthanasia advocate Jack Kevorkian known as "Dr. Death" will be paroled from from prison after serving eight years of a 10-25 year sendtence in Michigan, USA. Kevorkian aka/ “Dr. Death” was convicted of second-degree murder charges for the assisted suicide of Thomas Youk. Although Kevorkian had admittedly been involved in over 130 suicides prior to Youk’s, this was his first conviction. He is 79 years old now.

From Answers.com, the following best descibes his legacy:

"Jack Kevorkian is a former medical pathologist known for his high-profile antics in support of voluntary euthanasia. A 1952 graduate of the University of Michigan medical school, Kevorkian soon became known to colleagues as "Dr. Death" for his keen interest in dying patients. His first brush with professional controversy came in 1958, when he lost his job for suggesting that medical experiments be performed on consenting death row inmates in lieu of execution. After a career in various hospitals in California and Michigan, he settled in Michigan in 1982, where he earned a living in part by publishing articles on euthanasia in European medical journals. He became famous in the 1990s for his "death machine," a device he invented that allowed a user to self-inject an anesthetic and then a lethal dose of potassium chloride. (He called the machine a thanatron, after Thanatos, the figure of death in Greek mythology.) His initial "assisted suicides" led to a 1993 Michigan law that specifically prohibited him from continuing, a law he openly defied in an effort to force the issue into the courts.

For most of the 1990s Kevorkian -- now widely known as "Dr. Death" -- was on TV talk shows, in the news and in and out of court (and jail) for his role in a number of deaths. In September of 1998 he videotaped the death of Thomas Youk; the tape was broadcast by CBS television's 60 Minutes in November, and Kevorkian ended up on trial again, charged with murder and the delivery of a controlled substance. (Having lost his licenses to practice medicine in California and Michigan, Kevorkian's use of potassium chloride was illegal.) He was convicted in April of 1999 and sentenced to 10-25 years in prison. Denied parole in 2005, Kevorkian, in failing health, was granted parole at the end of 2006 and scheduled for release in 2007. Supporters argue that -- idiosyncrasies aside -- Kevorkian is a hero who helped more than 130 terminally ill people end their own lives with dignity. Critics say he is a weirdo who exploited sick and disabled people for his own morbid experiments. Either way, he gets credit for bringing the issue forward into public debate.

Kevorkian moved to Los Angeles in the late 1970s and reportedly made a feature film (based on Handel's Messiah), but the film was never distributed and the details are sketchy at best... Kevorkian is of Armenian descent... Kevorkian used to advertise himself as a "death consultant," and he dubbed his field "obitiatry"... He says he first got the nickname "Dr. Death" in 1956, for his research in photographing the eyes of dying patients... Kevorkian used carbon monoxide gas when he was unable to procure potassium chloride... Many of Kevorkian's clients passed away in his 1968 Volkswagen bus, which he had rigged for his equipment. (source)

To read about Kevorkian, here are some very interesting Links:

Frontline - The Kevorkian Verdict

Court T.V.

Unofficial Kevorkian Home Page

NNDP

Wikipedia

The Coroner's Journal

Coroner's Journal: Forensics and the Art of Stalking Death is not a Baton Rouge CSI. It is much more disturbing! Dr. Louis Cataldie will take your hand and walk you through the daily life of a coroner. You will feel the human-ness of the victims, their families, and most of all, Dr. Cataldie. This book is not a fictional account of "how exciting and sexy it is to be a coroner". It is pain, frustration, fear, paranoia, courage, love, determination and a first hand view of good triumphing evil. Thank you Dr. Cataldie for having the courage to share your heart and soul with the rest of us who don't live in Baton Rouge. Thank you for reminding us that the evil that rips families apart is not fodder for drama. It is a call to work together and love one another.

Cemetery Stories... Enter the world of the dead...

Cemetery Stories: Haunted Graveyards, Embalming Secrets, and the Life of a Corpse After Death



Never look at a grave the same way again.


Admit it: You're fascinated by cemeteries. We all die, and for most of us, a cemetery is our final resting place. But how many people really know what goes on inside, around, and beyond them?



Enter the world of the dead as Katherine Ramsland talks to mortuary assistants, gravediggers, funeral home owners, and more, and find out about:

• Stitching and cosmetic secrets used on mutilated bodies


• Embalmers who do more than just embalm


• The rising popularity of cremation art


• Ghosts that infest graveyards everywhere


• If you've ever scoffed at the high price of burying the dead, or ever wondered how your loved ones are handled when they die, or simply stared at tombstones with morbid fascination, then take a trip with Katherine Ramsland and learn about the booming industry -- and strange tales -- that surround cemeteries everywhere.

Pet Cremation and Pet Urns... There are some great choices out there!

Pet Cremation and Urns can be hard to find. Afterall, most people love their animals as much as any human... I have had quite a few people ask me about some good places to go online to find either something unusual, something affordable or something nice that they find for their pets remains... So here goes:

Everlasting Memories: You can have your pets hair or ashes placed inside a locket or piece of jewelry (pretty neat). They also have the traditional urns, memorial rocks and plaques.

One of my favorite sites: Angel Ashes -- They have really cool bookends (to hold your pets ashes) (see pic) They have traditional box urns, figurines and photo urns... I particularly like the angel urn (see pic)

Pet Loss Products is another great site. They also offer Pet Loss Grief help. There is also info on cloning, grief, loss, euthenasia ... and other things you really don't want to hear but have too!

Crazy Coffins Site -- How about a Guitar Coffin?

The family of a teenage boy, killed in a domestic accident, chose to bury him in a replica of the guitar he loved so well.

For more crazy coffins... Check out this blog and site. It's quite amazing what they make and what people ask for! Crazy Coffins

Fun Facts About Corpses... And other things you really don't want to know....

Funeral homes are actually banned by federal law from embalming your beloved departed without your permission. This will save you hundreds or thousands of dollars in costs, and it actually isn't likely to stink up the funeral too much. There is no legal requirement for embalming (except under extraordinary circumstances related to the condition of the corpse or cause of death). Your tax dollars at work!

If your funeral director balks at your effort to save thousands of dollars by opting to avoid a procedure that is mandated by neither religion nor hygienic necessity, try a Jewish funeral home. Jews are forbidden from having their corpses embalmed, under normal circumstances.
You can pack your loved one in dry ice, if you don't have time to embalm him or her right on the spot. A large freezer or cooler can also keep your loved one fresh for a couple days.

Embalming is mostly a North American practice in modern times. European corpses have that trendy "au naturel" look. But Lenin-style super-embalming has recently become the fashion among Russian Mafia bosses. Go figure.

There are more than 400 movies with the word "corpse" in the title, but only one movie with the word "embalming" in the title. It's 1999's Enbamingu, which is Japanese for "embalming." The movie features lots of depictions of Japanese embalming practices, among other things.

Read more from this site ... Like the "history of embalming;" "Mummification" and other interesting topics. All kidding aside... this is a pretty cool site if you have the stomach for it : )

(source)

BibliOdyssey.... Cool art!

BibliOdysseyThough Paul, the curator of this fantastical blog, claims that he's "not a mysterious persona by intent," his site brims with baffling images and mesmerizing, inexplicable creatures. ("If it looks like I know anything then the mirrors are working.") In weekly or semi-weekly dispatches, this Aussie persona posts etchings, illustrations, posters, and other "visual materia obscura" from around the globe and across time. Machines brush up against monsters. Sartorial skeletons from one century pass Polish children's illustrations from another. A Russian illustrator indulges in "retro fantasy folk whimsy." Winged humans swoop overhead; rare Japanese medical texts sit in wonder; "zoomorphic" Sudanese calligraphy romps past. Elephants and tigers and bears, oh my! The Web is rich in snarky celebrity gossip and fast-breaking news, but a visit to Paul's cabinet of curiosities leaves us satisfied and enthralled. The mirrors are definitely working.

Neon Sign Graveyard.... Make this your last stop in Las Vegas : )

Where do the Las Vegas Strip's neon signs go when they aren't considered flashy enough anymore? To the Neon Boneyard, more formally known as the Young Electric Sign Company's Neon Sign Graveyard. "Yesco," as the company is known to locals, maintains many of the city's best-known illuminated signs. But it has also preserved some past electric glory in a fenced lot behind its headquarters. The stockpile includes some of the city's bygone landmarks, from the flickering remains of a gigantic Silver Slipper to a mammoth Aladdin's lamp.

"I'll Compost Your Corpse"

“I’ll Compost Your Corpse” – The (Organic) Demise of Ethical Man
by Sami Grover, Carrboro, NC, USA on 04. 6.07

Culture & CelebrityWe have previously reported on the BBC’s Ethical Man, AKA Justin Rowlatt, here and here. While Justin is still very much alive and well, the time has come for him to bury his more altruistic alter-ego. In a fitting end to this educational series of reports, he explores an intriguing offer from a viewer – to compost his corpse. As it turns out, this isn’t that easy to do. The environmental problems of cremation and burial are duly discussed, in some detail:

“Apparently, the problem with the way a corpse decomposes at the bottom of a grave is that there isn’t enough oxygen to get a good aerobic compost going. The main by-products of aerobic decomposition include carbon dioxide and water meanwhile anaerobic decomposition produces methane - 23 times as powerful a greenhouse-gas as CO2.”

Nevertheless, it seems that burial or cremation really are the only legal options for disposing of a body in the UK at the present time. Things may be about to change however, as a radical new technique from Sweden may be introduced, involving freezing your body in liquid nitrogen, and then breaking it down into a biodegradable powder. John Crossham, however, is not impressed, arguing that there is too much embodied (sorry - I couldn't resist it) energy in the liquid nitrogen for this to make sense:

“Wouldn’t it be better just to get in a good butcher to cut the body into small and easily ‘compostable’ pieces?”

Ethical Man, may you rest in peace (or is that pieces?)… (source)

20 Things I Bet You Never Knew About Death

Just what you wanted to Read: 20 "INTERESTING" Things You Didn't Know About Death ..... might not want to read this over breakfast..... (I found #7 to be interesting)

09.01.2006

20 Things You Didn't Know About... Death

Newsflash: we're all going to die. But here are 20 things you didn't know
about kicking the bucket.

 1 The practice of burying the dead may date back 350,000 years, as evidenced by a 45-foot-deep pit in
Atapuerca, Spain, filled with the fossils of 27 hominids of the species Homo heidelbergensis, a possible ancestor of Neanderthals and modern humans.

2 Never say die: There are at least 200 euphemisms for death, including "to be in Abraham's bosom," "just add maggots," and "sleep with the Tribbles" (a Star Trek favorite).

3 No American has died of old age since 1951.

4 That was the year the government eliminated that classification on death certificates.

5 The trigger of death, in all cases, is lack of oxygen. Its decline may prompt muscle spasms, or the "agonal phase," from the Greek word agon, or contest.

6 Within three days of death, the enzymes that once digested your dinner begin to eat you. Ruptured cells become food for living bacteria in the gut, which release enough noxious gas to bloat the body and force the eyes to bulge outward.

7 So much for recycling: Burials in America deposit 827,060 gallons of embalming fluid—formaldehyde, methanol, and ethanol—into the soil each year. Cremation pumps dioxins, hydrochloric acid, sulfur dioxide, and carbon dioxide into the air.

8 Alternatively . . . A Swedish company, Promessa, will freeze-dry your body in liquid nitrogen, pulverize it with high-frequency vibrations, and seal the resulting powder in a cornstarch
coffin. They claim this "ecological burial" will decompose in 6 to 12 months.

9 Zoroastrians in India leave out the bodies of the dead to be consumed by vultures.

10 The vultures are now dying off after eating cattle carcasses dosed with diclofenac, an anti-inflammatory used to relieve fever in livestock.

11 Queen Victoria insisted on being buried with the bathrobe of her long-dead husband, Prince Albert, and a plaster cast of his hand.

12 If this doesn't work, we're trying in vitro! In Madagascar, families dig up the bones of dead relatives and parade them around the village in a ceremony called famadihana. The remains are then wrapped in a new shroud and reburied. The old shroud is given to a newly married, childless couple to cover the connubial bed.

13 During a railway expansion in Egypt in the 19th century, construction companies unearthed so many mummies that they used them as fuel for locomotives.

14 Well, yeah, there's a slight chance this could backfire: English philosopher Francis Bacon, a founder of the scientific method, died in 1626 of pneumonia after stuffing a chicken with snow to see if cold would preserve it.

15 For organs to form during embryonic development, some cells must commit suicide. Without such programmed cell death, we would all be born with webbed feet, like ducks.

16 Waiting to exhale: In 1907 a Massachusetts doctor conducted an experiment with a specially designed deathbed and reported that the human body lost 21 grams upon dying. This has been widely held as fact ever since. It's not.

17 Buried alive: In 19th-century Europe there was so much anecdotal evidence that living people were mistakenly declared dead that cadavers were laid out in "hospitals for the dead" while attendants awaited signs of putrefaction.

18 Eighty percent of people in the United States die in a hospital.

19 If you can't make it here . . . More people commit suicide in New York City than are murdered.

20 It is estimated that 100 billion people have died since humans began.

(Source: Discover Magazine)

Ghost slip ons .... Shoes by Ed Hardy ... I LOVE THESE!

I'm only posting this because they are called "GHOST" and I really, really like them!!!!!


GHOST/07 - $ 59.98
ROUND TOE SLIP ON

Elvis's Last Meal????

According to The Great Food Almanac: A Feast of Facts from A to Z by Irena Chalmers, the last food that Elvis Presley ate was four scoops of ice cream and 6 chocolate chip cookies.

Famous Last Words ... Epitath

Leave 'em laughing, they say in show business, and if you've ever wandered around an old cemetery, you know that some folks do -- or, at least, manage to end the conversation on a memorable note. (Everyone wants to be remembered); The Epitath Browser has a nice mix of famous folk (and how glad am I to learn that Mel Blanc rests beneath a stone with "That's all folks" on it?) and obscure, who have in common terrific epitaths on their gravestones or cenotaphs. There are some beautiful items here, but those of a cheerfully morbid disposition will appreciate the funny ones too, such the inscription above Ms. Sarah Ford: This stone was raised to Sarah Ford,

Not Sarah's virtues to record--
For they're well known to all the town--
No Lord; it was raised to keep her down.

(source: USA Today)

Legendery Crooner Don Ho has Died : (

Legendary crooner Don Ho, who entertained tourists for decades wearing raspberry-tinted sunglasses and singing the catchy signature tune "Tiny Bubbles," has died. He was 76.
He died Saturday morning of heart failure, publicist Donna Jung said.

Ho had suffered with heart problems for the past several years, and had a pacemaker installed last fall. In 2005, he underwent an experimental stem cell procedure on his ailing heart in Thailand.

Don Ho worked right up to the end. Promoter Tom Moffatt said he attended Ho's final show Thursday and Ho received a standing ovation. Afterward, Ho reminisced about his many years in Waikiki and talked about how Judy Garland sang with him one night.

Ho entertained Hollywood's biggest stars and thousands of tourists for four decades. For many, no trip to Hawaii was complete without seeing his Waikiki show _ a mix of songs, jokes, double entendres, Hawaii history and audience participation. Shows usually started and ended with the same song, "Tiny Bubbles." Ho mostly hummed the song's swaying melody as the audience enthusiastically took over the familiar lyrics: "Tiny bubbles/in the wine/make me happy/make me feel fine."

"I hate that song," he often joked to the crowd. He said he performed it twice because "people my age can't remember if we did it or not."

Donald Tai Loy Ho, who was Hawaiian, Chinese, Portuguese, Dutch and German, was born Aug. 13, 1930, in Honolulu and grew up in the then-rural countryside of Kaneohe. In high school, he was a star football player and worked for a brief time in a pineapple cannery. After graduating in 1949, he attended Springfield College in Massachusetts on an athletic scholarship. He grew homesick, returned to the islands and ended up graduating from the University of Hawaii in 1953 with a degree in sociology.

Inspired by the U.S. military planes flying in and out of Hawaii during World War II, Ho joined the Air Force. As the Korean War wound down, he piloted transport planes between Hickam Air Force Base in Honolulu and Tokyo.

When he returned home and took over his parents' struggling neighborhood bar, Honey's, he put together a band and started performing at his father's request. "I had no intention of being an entertainer," Ho said. "I just played songs I liked from the radio, and pretty soon that place was jammed. Every weekend there would be lines down the street."

Honey's became a happening place on Oahu, with other Hawaiian musicians stopping in for jam sessions. Ho began to play at various spots in Hawaii, then had a breakout year in 1966, when appearances at the Coconut Grove in Hollywood helped him build a mainland following, and the release of "Tiny Bubbles" gave him his greatest recording success.

Soon he was packing places such as the Flamingo Hotel in Las Vegas. Stars such as Lucille Ball, Sammy Davis Jr. and Frank Sinatra were known to be in the audience for Ho's shows.
Ho also became a television star, and hosted the "The Don Ho Show" on ABC from 1976-77. One of Ho's most memorable TV appearances was a 1972 cameo on an episode of "The Brady Bunch."

If you want to meet the "man" read this Q&A from "Weekly Hi Hi - Honolulu" and if you want to hear the great "Don Ho" listen to his music: Don Ho - Greatest Hits.

Rest in Peace Don.

Don Ho Singing "Tiny Bubbles"

Medusa Van Allen "Little Miss Sunshine"

Medusa Van Allen was Born in Ohio on March 19, 1908, she was 30" long and weighed in at 55 lbs. The bones in Medusa’s body never grew, with the exception of her head. Because of her undeveloped bones, Medusa could never sit or stand. She could only lay flat. Doctors could do nothing for her bizarre condition. As an adult, Medusa’s head was a normal size, yet her body remained like that of a baby. With the help of a private tutor her brain also reached an adult level. She exhibited herself as one of Ripley’s human oddities in the 1930s and was dubbed "Little Miss Sunshine." In her pamphlet pitched at shows, Medusa said, “I enjoy life in much the same way as any normal person, and find life filled with really worthwhile pleasures.” (source)

For more visit: American Sideshows Bookshelf

Cardboard Coffins.... Paper friendly : )

Looking for an eco friendly way to be buried? An inexpensive way? What do you think of cardboard? You will be surprised. Visit CardboardCasket.com to view their services and price list. You will be quite surprised. Here are a few pictures to get you interested. : )

The Eco Burial - Unfortunately modern cemeteries all too often destroy natural landscapes and chew up valuable open space: creating fertilized and herbicided, environments with dense interments and plastic flowers. A tremendous amount of money goes into expensive “leak-proof” caskets, vaults and mausoleum crypts, and to “perpetual care”.

The average cost of funeral, burial space, casket and vault is now exceeding $5,000, and can go considerably higher.

In our parks, a significant part of the burial space expense goes to purchasing, restoring and maintaining real nature parks. Burials and ashes scatterings occur in these parks, but the interments must be natural, “dust to dust” burials (see related article on natural burials): no toxic embalming fluids, no vaults, and only biodegradable caskets. Because these are often the very expensive items, the total funeral costs for burial at Memorial Ecosystems parks are much less expensive than current averages. Because the total number of burials is strictly limited, far fewer interments occur than at usual memorial parks.

In addition, there is a grass-roots reaction to the centralization and skyrocketing costs of burials. Industrial boards which set legislative policies ("laws") are composed of members of the consolidated industry itself, giving these few individuals power to set regulations to A) keep their profits (your costs) as high as they can and B) prevent anyone from challenging "A". Not only are the inmates running the asylum, but they are setting laws for those on the outside!
In our grandfather's era, no such intervention was expected, or even permitted. The deceased was dressed for viewing, usually in the home where the services were also usually held, and then off to burial. Care for the departed remained with those he or she loved in life. This caretaking may also have assisted in grieving as it provided an involving and proactive way to say goodbyes. It has been so for hundreds of thousands of years of human history... except for the last century.

We now have an industrial machine which has by its own admission consolidated in preparation for the huge profits it believes will come with the passing of the baby boomer generation. An industry that has turned death into a sanitized and intellectualized service, rather than a reality as natural as the birth that preceeded it.

Weather these caskets will involve a burial or no, is entirely up to you. Please check your local laws... your local group of funeral directors may have made it illegal to bury your own dead ithout their embalming, metal caskets, hearses, floral arrangements, service kickbacks, concrete vaults, and all the rest of it that makes for such lucrative trade in death.

- John Bottomley, with the first part of this letter gratefully copied from memorialecosystems.com.

James Doohan, "Scotty" of Star Trek -- Going to Outer Space : )

The ashes of James Doohan, who played chief engineer Montgomery "Scotty" Scott on the original "Star Trek" TV series, have been loaded into a rocket that is set to launch in New Mexico later this month.

The remains of Doohan, Mercury astronaut Gordon Cooper and some 200 others were loaded into the rocket Friday by Charles Chafer, chief executive of Celestis, a Texas company that contracts with rocket firms to send cremated remains into space.

"And we're ready to go," Chafer said after inserting the silver canister.
Jerry Larson, president of Connecticut-based UP Aerospace Inc., said the rocket will be launched April 28.

Families paid $495 to have a few grams of their loved one's ashes placed on the rocket.
Chafer said he's aware of the dedication of "Star Trek" fans.

"There's no doubt that we'll find a way to accommodate fans who travel here and want to be part of that experience," he said.

Doohan died in July 2005 at age 85.

The remains of "Star Trek" creator Gene Roddenberry were blasted into space in 1997.

HAUNT WORLD .... More than seeing dead people...

HauntWorld.com bills itself as "the biggest haunt finder network on the Internet." And though we can't verify that spine-chilling boast, we can tell you that its state locator and ghoulish reviews make the site our first visit for nailing down the season's creepiest spots. So, hold your breath, brush aside the cobwebby banner ads, and march bravely in. Here are the two most bewitching places to enter...

Top 13 Haunted Houses for 2006—a Kentucky steamboat, two Las Vegas semi-trucks, and a St. Louis hayride join those vying for scariest haunt, but it's Ulster, New York's headless horseman that gallops away with the honor.

Haunted News—this section scares up a list of Halloween how-tos and articles from across the Web. Tips on crafting the spookiest yards, a profile of south Jersey's real-life Ghostbusters, and a rundown of the scariest ghost towns all prowl its borders.

"I BOO" .... errrr, I mean "I DO"

An Illinois couple has found their ideal wedding venue: A graveyard.

"The couple said that deep down a graveyard just seemed right...'People are going to think how they want...' [the groom] said. 'I’m not a freak or Satan worshipper or cult member. It just goes with our theme.'"

A theme that includes a refurbished hearse. At the same time as the wedding, a burial may also be scheduled.

"He said the graveyard offers a tranquility and thriftiness that he wants to be part of his small and private, traditional wedding."

The couple became engaged when the groom placed a sign saying "Will you marry me?" onto the side of his 1965 hearse. How could the bride refuse?

Diamonds from cremated remains : ) Bid for a diamond made from Ludwig van Beethoven's hair!

I can't resist ... is it Robert DiNiro's famous line ... "Do you want a piece of me?" Well Life Gem put's a whole new spin on that line : )

Want to have your loved one with you always? No kidding ...Or think about this, passing your loved one down as an heirloom? You can. LifeGems.com has a process where they can turn your cremated ashes into diamonds....

Normally, carbon leaves the body in the form of carbon dioxide during the cremation process, says Mark Bouffard, a LifeGem spokesman. But a patented process that manipulates the oxygen level in the cremation oven allows the carbon to remain. Then, the carbon is collected, heated in a vacuum until it becomes pure graphite, and sent to a lab where a gem is created in six to eight weeks instead of the usual several million years. The diamonds are naturally light blue, but LifeGem is also creating red and yellow ones by removing boron and adding color to the gems. And the diamond owners won't have to worry about misplacing all that remains of Grandma or Grandpa. "Each person has enough carbon to make 50 to 100 life gems," Bouffard says. "We'll store the remaining carbon just in case."

And, right now: To showcase Life Gem's newest technology, they are creating three LifeGem diamonds with the carbon from Ludwig van Beethoven's hair! These will be the only three diamonds ever created from Beethoven’s carbon and could be considered the three most rare and valuable diamonds in the world. Go to their site for more info about this auction! (Click here)

Just remember... diamonds are forever .... (I think Shirley Bassey said that ; ) ) and it seems she is dead on!

Plant a Memorial Tree

I thought this was actually interesting. I came across a site called "Tree Givers" where you can have a tree planted as a memorial as opposed to sending flowers. Something different... something unique. Figured I would post it. This is something I would actually be included to do:

Plant a Memorial Tree

TreeGivers memorials are one of the most meaningful ways to express your sympathy to families. While flowers will fade, the thought of a young tree being planted for someone will last a lifetime. The memorial planting is a remembrance of the past and at the same time a renewing of life. Living, Growing Legacy. Benefiting the environment for years to come...
Treegivers trees are planted on public lands all across the country where each one, in its own way, will grow and benefit all of us.

"I Told You I Was Sick"

(Source)

Cape Cod Grave Stones .... Interesting

Popular fiction has doomed the cemetery to a reputation as a creepy, dark place where evil things are bound to happen. But we suggest you leave the terrific tales to horror novelists and view graveyards with a different perspective. This site provides a fascinating place to start your peace-making journey with cemeteries. Attempting to document every pre-1860 gravestone in Cape Cod, Robert Paine Carlson has produced a site that brims with historical import. Begin your trip inside these rock-laden yards with the quick tour of gravestone styles from 1683 to 1799 and then wander over to look at styles from 1800 to 1900. After boning up on the basics, we recommend poking through his extensive catalogue of photos from a variety of Cape Cod's final resting places. Read the maudlin inscription on Rebekah Jenkins' headstone, marvel at the grandeur of Ebenezer Crocker's massive stone, or peep at the creepy skull adorning Job Avery's marker. In a time when anything over 25-years-old is considered to be of historical import, Carlson's dutiful work in documenting these true American relics should compel you to leave your fear at the cemetery gates.

Caskets on Parade ... A Death Contest ....

Very interesting site .... Caskets on Parade. It's actually a contest site of sorts. If you read the About Us Page, you will get the following info: : )

Caskets On Parade is the name of our little Ghoul/Death/Dead Pool-type contest. The object of the game is to identify (up to) 75 notable individuals who will die during the contest year. Points are awarded based upon the age and uniqueness of selection of individual Victims of the Grim Reaper.

The contest runs annually (we missed 1986-1987 & 1997-99). Since 1978 our entrants have been making their lists, checking them twice, hopin' to figure out who's sickly, or foolish, or just plain unlucky.

Unlike many of the other contests that you run across on the internet, we accept a fairly large list of potential Victims of the Grim Reaper (75). Also, our contest is scored in four different categories —

• Total Points Scored
• Total Kills Scored
• Solo Kills Scored
• Quality of Kills

We also offer several other "honorary" awards to entrants who:
Give a Good Rookie Performance

• Produce a totally "null" list of potential Grim Reaper victims
• Have failed to notice the most obvious of prior deaths

Like most of the other contests, our's runs for the (Gregorian) calendar year - January 1st through December 31st. For the sake of brevity we employ mnemonic identifiers as a shorthand notation in our various listings & databases to identify the contest entrants.
During January we compile the accepted entries and post all of the projected Grim Reaper Victims and their selectors on this website. On a regular basis an Update of Standings is published / updated in the relevant contest year subsite; we've finally gotten out of the printing & mailing business.

Entry submission takes place in the week before New Year's Eve. The 2007 Contest is currently under way; too late to enter. However ... the 2008 Contest will be here before you know it; get to work on those submission lists now.

If you'd like to read more dead-poolish blather, click on through to our collection of FAQ pages (Frequently Asked Qustions).

Check out their Grim Reaper Page: Victims of the Grim Reaper